Every time my phone rings and it’s a number I don’t recognize, I immediately answer. When it’s not CRM (Center for Reproductive Medicine) telling me they have some donor profiles, I get such a disappointed feeling.
Back in March, we got a call saying that we could start receiving profiles as early as August. They said the waiting list is typically 5 months. At that time, we still had more testing to do, but wanted to be on the waiting list so that if everything went OK, we wouldn’t lose our place in line.
At first, we were a little freaked. That is so soon! But the more we thought about it, the more we just forgot about it. And then August hit. And it’s all I can think about. I check my email multiple times a day. I answer phone calls of numbers I don’t know. I even had my first IVF dream last night. I dreamt that we went in for a normal appointment and then the doctor had eggs and we did a transfer. I was so worried about having to go into work and I didn’t want to stand up or move.
I have this nervous and anxious feeling. I think about what kind of gift I can get this woman who is out there bravely willing to donate her eggs to a stranger. I think about joining the Y so I can start working out again. I think about “When should I start acupuncture?”
Then I think back to the colonoscopy. They took some biopsies and a week later (after a well rested trip to Vegas) they were benign. They also didn’t really say much or find much. I haven’t gone back in for a follow up appointment – but I feel like they said if there was something (cancer, colitis, chrons) they would have told us after the surgery. I’m pretty sure that’s what they said.
So, I’m moving forward with things as planned. Find donor in August. Start the meds soon after. Implantation around Thanksgiving.
Ok, it’s August….We’re ready.